Friday, November 25, 2011
Saying Goodbye is never easy!
Saying goodbye is never easy, but when you are leaving your 3.5 year old for an unknown amount of time ... It is horrible. Our last day with Z was fun but hard. He is a shy little guy and yet we have seen a small windows into a a big personality waiting to be uncovered. The week went so fast with him and the reality is, he really doesn't understand much of what is going on ... Including, who are these forenge's that keep showing up and smothering me in hugs. The older children, however, are an entirely different story. Today I watched as the children gathered around Yonas and were inquiring when their families were coming. For some, the news was bright ... Parents were coming and coming soon. But I also watched as one little girl sat in tears and asked why she didn't yet have a family. I watched as Yonas told her that soon God would bring her one. My heart ached and a lump filled my throat. We adore our Z and would love to say that he was broken when we left but the reality is, he is still too young to get it and too young to understand this process. Sure, he will soon understand what a family is ... But not yet. Saying goodbye was torture for us ... But honestly, I am actually relieved that he doesn't know yet what he is missing. How much harder it has been to watch those families with older kids who do get it. Words cannot describe their sadness. We wait anxiously to return so we can begin to grow as a family and watch in wonder as our Z blooms over time. But today ... Today I watched children we did understand what it means to not have a family. I watched what being chosen feels and looks like. I also saw what it looks like when you are not chosen. If I can send one plea, it would be to ask if that family is you. Is God calling you to a older child? There are many who hope so! The kids are beautiful and full of joy! They are created in his image and yurning to be loved by a family. I will say that I am so impressed by our transitional home. The Nanny's love the kids and the home is well cared for but yet, it is still not a family!
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3 comments:
hi cristie,
i have loved reading all about meeting zebene!! i am thankul court went well!!!
thankful also for your call to others to step forward for the older ones. it's hard, isn't it. praying He raises up families!
erika
Praying over you as you finish packing. Flying away from ET can be a very emotonal experience as you process it all and long for Z. I know Maliah will be happy to see you! Praying for smooth travels and healed tummy.
Hi Cristie and Family,
I cannot imagine how hard "goodbye" was.
I recently read about a heavy-hearted missionary who was praying one evening and felt a depression on the couch next to him, though when he opened his eyes, he saw no one visibly there. Then he felt a large warm hand pressing into his lower back and straightening him. He felt stronger. A soft voice said, "I am strengthening you...I will help you because He loves you," and he knew it was an angel.
May you all be strengthened by the hosts of heaven because of His great love and delight in you.
God bless you all!
Love,
Gina
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