Going Public

Two posts ago in my post truth be told, I briefly mentioned that many we know choose to homeschool their children on the basis of what their children may hear and learn in the Public School system.  I mentioned that for us, we actually welcome those things most run from (so we can teach and train on them while under our roof) and was one of the reasons we actually don't want to school our kids at home.  By doing so I received a few comments, e-mails etc. to the subject.  And P.S.  They weren't rude, condescending or judgmental - thank you, I so appreciate you!   But, over the past few weeks, we have encountered a few of those type scenarios and I thought I'd share a little more of what I meant and how we handle them.  Nothing big, but since I often get to glean from Homeschooling families on all the cool ideas they have, I thought I'd share a little on what life is like when your Going Public.

While I do,  I thought I'd also share a great book written by David and Kelli Pritchard called "Going Public".  The Pritchard's are parents of 8 kids whom all attended the public school system.  The book gives some great insight on how kids can not only "survive" but thrive in the public school system.   I love their ideas of how to teach solid biblical principles to encourage 3 things while your kids are swimming with the whales 1.)  Loving God with all his or her heart, 2.)  Obeying you unconditionally and 3.)  Practicing self-control.   It's a great book on how what to consider and how to be prepared for those teachable moments.

The debate of where and how to school one's children is a huge one!  Even in my own sphere of precious friends - we all do it different.  I like this!  I think we can each learn from this and from one another!  I don't think we are called to one way of education.  In fact, if I believe that if we are truly seeking the Lord's will for our lives and children then I would have to believe he is the one who places on our hearts where HE wants our children to be educated.  The question isn't where are they going, but rather ... are you listening?  But the reality is often that this decision (whatever it is)  can also lead to judgement from one another on what we think is "Right".   In all honesty, the Christian community is the worst at this and on many days I find myself thinking "if I wasn't a Christian - I don't think I'd want to be one".  We are often not inviting to our faith as we seek to point fingers at one another at "how it should be done".    This makes my stomach swirl in knots and is completely destructive to the gospel message and one of his greatest commandments "Love your neighbor as yourself".

This post isn't about any of that ... no judgement, no condemnation, no convincing you why you should do it "my way".   In fact, I read lots of blogs written from the perspective of  homeschooling families and to be honest ... I love them.  I gain lots of ideas, lots of insight and lots of tools for my own home.  Did you know - I send my kids to the public school for 7 hours a day and THEN when they arrive home, I school them as well.  I know -  crazy!   But in reality, many of the things I read from great ideas from homeschooling Mom's are things I do - every. single. day because you shared them and I thought "hey, I can do that too".  See - we can learn from one another.  In reality though, we do all home school our children - public, private or home school  ... but some just happen to be taught reading, writing and arithmetic somewhere else and by someone else than in our homes each day.  The rest is all up to us - the parents!  We are their training ground.   The problem comes when the parents aren't willing to teach and use those teachable moments wisely.  That's not the school systems fault and can happen with any education you decide to provide.

O.K. I did want to acknowledge that homeschooling Mom's are my heroes.  I just recently began working with our newest arrival home, Zebene, on "school" work each day.  Hear me now ... I have no CLUE how you do this all. the. time.  I am about to pull my hair out.  I find myself several times a day thinking "Oh dear Jesus, please don't make me ever have to homeschool all my kids".  Uh huh, that's the truth - I will run as fast as I can from the idea.  There, I said it out loud.  Even in my hesitation as I know it might garner hate e-mails or worse, the Lord saying "Oh, Cristie - never say never" and then him calling me right to it.  Oh well,  I said it anyways!  It is SO the truth!

So on to my scenarios.

First, the "blue" note arrived home yesterday.  It's that time.  My son is a 5th grader and it is time for him to see the "Growing Up For Boys" video.  Gasp!  If he's that old ... then I am REALLY OLD - I digress.  Anyways, upon reading the little blue note I noticed that I would be invited to preview this video by calling the school nurse.  Of course I would want to preview this ... you are teaching my son about male maturation.  Who wouldn't?  Well, one phone call told me different.  Upon contacting our awesome nurse, she conveyed to me that last year only one parent previewed the movie prior to sending their little cherubs off for this huge event.  She also informed me that so far ... I am the only one who has called yet.  Ugh!  No props to me ... but perhaps a little reality check that parents do need to be more involved.

Maturation videos and more.  Yes, it's a part of your school system.  Many gasp that their might be something taught that they don't agree with (ie ... abstinence vs. birth control in the upper grades).  For us, we view this as yet another opportunity to lay our foundation of how the Lord sees intimacy, our beautiful bodies, and his creations.  This video for Canyon won't be the first time he's heard these things ... No, for him, he's been having ongoing conversations with Daddy and even an awesome weekend away to discuss the all encompassing "passport to purity"  (yet another great resource to check out).
But even so, we'll be previewing that movie next week and we'll be ready and prepared to have good conversation and discussion about what he's learned.   I am so thankful that he will indeed see this video ... this week, it was our reminder that our little boy is growing up and these conversations are so important along the way!

Second scenario.

Dakota comes home from school telling me some boy has called her a "racist".  She looks at me funny and says "What is that anyways"?   One more thing we have always done in our home ... every question gets the truth and any time you hear a word at school or anywhere else, you have free reign to SAY the word to Mommy and Daddy and to ask us what it means (and we will tell you the truth!) and if it is appropriate to use.  Hmmm mmm ... we have had lots of them!   Someday remind me to tell you about a conversation we had when my son asked what a "dike" was.  P.S.  he didn't learn that at school, he read it on a bumper sticker.  It can happen - anywhere!  I also personally loved the time that Dakota informed me that someone she knew was using the "F" word.  Upon further investigation and asking, we realized that Dakota thought the "F" word was "freaking".  While used in the same context, it still sounds awful ... we were happy to let Dakota know that that wasn't the word she thought it was.

So, after some lengthy discussion of what a racist was and asking her in what context this little boy was using it, we realized he probably didn't know what it meant either.  Dakota also learned pretty quickly one thing ... she wasn't one and she was certain of that because well, after all (as she exclaimed) "my own brother is black".   This brought a great conversation about how the world sometimes sees the colors God made and how we see them through his eyes.   God created us all in his image.  Period.

Scenario three.

The kids come in from playing basketball outside with some neighborhood kids and Dakota shares that a bunch of them were using inappropriate language.  We ask what exactly they were saying only to find out that it was some pretty awful things.   This broke out into a great conversation about how we get to choose our choices and what direction in life we'll take - our integrity etc.  We talked about how you don't have to tell on your friends or even be ugly in correcting them, but by simply not joining in ... you stand apart and stand for something (someone!) they may have never known.  We also talked about how hard that might be ... swimming upstream in a current going downstream.  This conversation led into a deeper one of how they are getting to the ages that their will be harder and harder choices  to make - drugs, alcohol and peer pressure to do other things that we know are not only destructive but against God's word.   I love these moments ... I secretly pray they happen.

Scenario four.

This one happened a while ago, but I have always loved this one.  When Dakota was in Kindergarten their was a little boy who had his folder signed every single day.  It bothered Dakota to a great degree that this little guy just couldn't make good choices.  She began to pray for him every single night.

One day, Dakota arrived home telling me that this same little boy told her that "there was no God".   Dakota, at age 5 responded to this little guy with the straight up truth.  When I asked her what she said she told me this "I told him uh huh, there was a God ... it says so in Genesis 1:1.  He created heaven and earth and Adam and Even and he sent his son, Jesus, to die on a cross for our sins.  If you don't believe that, you'll go to hell".  
GASP!  We still lacked some delivery on that one and some time to teach Dakota how to love others and how to share his message bathed in love and grace ... but, well, she was technically right and already willing to share her faith so perhaps we were on to something.   And to add ... she now decided she had one more way to pray for little Javon - his salvation and to know Jesus.

Going Public.  It isn't for everyone ... but it is for some.  For our family, we take each year as it comes.  We pray and seek what it is that the Lord wants for each of our children.  In the meantime, it seems we are "Going Public".  And since we are ... we're taking HIM with us!

Happy schooling ... wherever it is!