waiting ...

MONTHS!!

Waiting that is ... as of yesterday, our paperwork has been in Ethiopia for 2 months and for 2 months we have been in "line" to be matched to our son (a referral).  

We know our time and our day will come.  We take great peace in knowing that the Lord knows exactly who our Levi is and on what day and at what time he will reveal him to us.  

I love to sit in that thought!  

As I prepare to leave for my mission trip though, I find myself longing more and more to see his face and know his birth name.  I suppose part of me was hoping that I'd jet off to Ethiopia just knowing.  There is something so wild to think that I'll be walking the very city our son will be in, roaming the very countryside he calls home and not KNOW yet who he is.   I think I'll wonder with every sweet face I see ... will he have those eyes, that smile, those curls?  Will he be that shy, that outgoing, that determined, that loving?  Will he be short or tall?  Will he want to sit on my lap awhile and read a book or would he prefer to grab a ball and run like the wind?  Which toy would be his favorite ... the hackey sack?  the soccer ball?  the matchbox car?  All my wonders wrapped up in the faces of so many children just like him ... in an orphanage, without a Mommy waiting!  That might be the hardest part.   So many waiting, wanting, needing and hoping ... I'll see it in their faces and know his says the same.  

Today, my child is an orphan!  Today, my child is waiting just like me to know who I AM, only his wait will have been far longer than my "wait" has been!

Cross em' off ... two months down.  Only the Lord knows how many we have to go, or how many their have really already been.  

Psalm 139: 15 -16 "My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place.  When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body.  All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be".